Friday, 13 August 2010

My name is Mary-Jo...

...and I'm an Ebay-holic.

I didn't want to admit it, in fact I'd vehemently deny it if anyone accused me - 'I can stop bidding whenever I want...I just don't want to!'

However, every addict gets a wake-up call; that huge epiphany that shows you what started out as a harmless vice has finally gone too far.

So there I was, happily browsing some vintage beauties on my clothing Mecca, when I realised something. That bath I'd been running, to have before I cleaned the house (hey, I have to be clean if I want other things to be clean, right? Right?)...well that's been running for quite some time, hasn't it?

SHIIIIIITTT!!!!!

Dashing upstairs as fast as my little legs could carry me, I breathed a sigh of relief when I realised that, yes, the bath was deep enough to go swimming in, but I hadn't created an Atlantis for my cat, guinea pigs, budgie and valuables to live in. I happily settled into my bubbly palace, but couldn't shake off how close I was to possibly damaging the house. And all because I just love Ebay so much. I'm not normally so irresponsible - ditzy, sure, but not irresponsible.

The problem is that Ebay is...well it's bloody amazing quite frankly. And it's very easy for someone as obsessed with fashion as I am to spend far too much time and money on it. Bidding often starts at 99p, so it's dangerously easy to justify buying 10 million more things and conveniently forget about P&P costs.

I'll spend hours trawling its pages (sort of the online equivalent of TK Maxx) for clothes I've made up in my head, dresses that probably don't exist and never have, clothes that probably won't even fit right when they do arrive and will end up gathering dust in the back of my wardrobe.

I've ended up hating people I've never met, declaring mental vendettas against probably very nice people who just happened to commit the mortal sin of outbidding me in the last 10 seconds. I'm actually a very nice person in real life, but Ebay turns me into a bloodthirsty fiend, who would probably fight you to the death for those pixie boots.

Clearly action needs to be taken, after these items have ended, I won't buy anything else from that wretched place again...probably...

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